I decide I'll be the super-secure new girlfriend, and I say, Sure, Ann can stay with us. A week? Two? Sure. After all, she's the one who got dumped, and I'm the one webbed in between Andy's flannel sheets. I make sure I look hot when she gets here-not the dressed-up-for-you hot, but the I'm-so-good-looking-I-don't-have-to-try hot-which takes me a hair hour in the morning, and six changes of clothes during the day.I decide she's cute, but not as muscular as I am, and not as tall, and not as smart. Andy picked her in a moment of desperation, before he ever dreamed of being with someone like me.I befriend her.While Andy's at work, we swap tales of his performance in bed. She tells tales of impotence, which I've heard from Andy. I tell her he gets it up fine for me; I don't say it braggingly because I don't have to. I tell her our problem is that I have to ask him a billion times a month to go down on me, and he does it like it's a fucking favor. I know he never went down on Ann, but she tells me anyway. "I know," I say, to let her know she and Andy share no secrets.We make Andy cook dinner for us, while we tease him about all the shitty senseless things he did to Ann when they were dating. Like, she went on a backpacking trip for two weeks, and he rented her his tent, which he neglected to tell her had four leaks. "I didn't know myself," he defends, sticking his head in the oven."I feel really bad about how I treated you, Ann," he says later, while we're all drinking wine.Ann thanks him because she's nice.And she's good looking, in an apple pie sort of way, and I tell Andy I really want to have her in bed with us. I tell him it's so weird and arbitrary that she slept in his bed when they had the couple label and now we have the label so I'm in the bed and she's out. I shudder to think of myself as the next one on the floor.He says no way.I want to fuck her. I want her to be mine, and not just Andy's.
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I decide I'll be the super-secure new girlfriend, and I say, Sure, Ann can stay with us. A week? Two? Sure. After all, she's the one who got dumped, and I'm the one webbed in between Andy's flannel sheets. I make sure I look hot when she gets here-not the dressed-up-for-you hot, but the I'm-so-good-looking-I-don't-have-to-try hot-which takes me a hair hour in the morning, and six changes of clothes during the day.I decide she's cute, but not as muscular as I am, and not as tall, and not as smart. Andy picked her in a moment of desperation, before he ever dreamed of being with someone like me.I befriend her.While Andy's at work, we swap tales of his performance in bed. She tells tales of impotence, which I've heard from Andy. I tell her he gets it up fine for me; I don't say it braggingly because I don't have to. I tell her our problem is that I have to ask him a billion times a month to go down on me, and he does it like it's a fucking favor. I know he never went down on Ann, but she tells me anyway. "I know," I say, to let her know she and Andy share no secrets.We make Andy cook dinner for us, while we tease him about all the shitty senseless things he did to Ann when they were dating. Like, she went on a backpacking trip for two weeks, and he rented her his tent, which he neglected to tell her had four leaks. "I didn't know myself," he defends, sticking his head in the oven."I feel really bad about how I treated you, Ann," he says later, while we're all drinking wine.Ann thanks him because she's nice.And she's good looking, in an apple pie sort of way, and I tell Andy I really want to have her in bed with us. I tell him it's so weird and arbitrary that she slept in his bed when they had the couple label and now we have the label so I'm in the bed and she's out. I shudder to think of myself as the next one on the floor.He says no way.I want to fuck her. I want her to be mine, and not just Andy's. Reply Report